Don’t get your hopes up!

That’s what I used to be told when I was young.  I guess I was always a dreamer and I know I was definitely a loner.  Being on my own for hours on end never bothered me.  I entertained myself with books and with my writing – I was always writing, even as a young child.  And my dreams would take me to places that I could only dream about.

My parents did not have a lot of money and with 4 children in the space of just over 5 years and only one income in the household, it meant that we did not get to travel much and only in our own state.  We never went without, don’t get me wrong. Our home was filled with love, we were always fed and well clothed.  Mum sewed and cooked and kept house and did everything a mother should do. She was always home for us kids and we never came home to an empty house.

However I remember things that were said at school, at friend’s places, and in our home that made me feel I shouldn’t be hoping, or dreaming, or expecting for bigger or better things in my life. That I shouldn’t get my hopes up.  And I found as I got older that I was the one in control of my own life, my hopes and plans and dreams. I kept reading books that would fill my mind with what could be and I determined to learn more and more.  My grandmother told me when I was aged 14 ‘the day I stop learning is the day I die’ and I determined I would always keep learning.

Verse 26 tells us ‘She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue’ and I want to encourage you to think about what you say to and around your children. Do your words and actions tell them not to get their hopes up? Perhaps it’s not even your own children but kids who hang around where you are on a regular basis.  You can’t take back words you speak and it’s so easy to say something in jest but for it to be taken to heart in someone else.

I don’t know who it was that told me ‘don’t get your hopes up’ but I can tell you I carried that phrase with me for almost 30 years.  And it was only because of a very kind couple who took my husband and I under their wings, and fed us with motivational tapes and books, and took us to listen to people who had fascinating stories to tell, that my hopes did rise and that I learned I could take action and make something of my life.  That is was up to me and it had nothing to do with how I grew up, my own personal circumstances, or how rich or poor I might be.  It had to do with how I responded to things and the decisions I made. And I learnt not to tell my own children ‘don’t get your hopes up’.  Instead I encouraged them and shared with them, and told them to go for their dreams and you know what? They are!

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2 Responses to “Don’t get your hopes up!”

  1. Kimberly Says:

    Very well put Kathie. Thank you!

  2. Beverly Mahone Says:

    Kathie,

    This is a very inspiring story for anyone who has ever been where you have. I am blessed to have had parents who encouraged me to be the very best I could be! I think that’s because the knew the obstacles I could face as a black female. But I have never waivered because I know a God who is faithful to his promises.

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