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Proverbs 31:11-12 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.

Graham and I recently had a long weekend away – just the two of us. We had late morning lay-ins, earlier than usual nights in bed, long lazy walks and drives in the country, and one afternoon that was wet and cold, saw us return to the cottage we had hired, to sit, read and write and spend the afternoon in quiet solitude together.

Once again, in this quietness and relaxation, I was struck by just how well matched we are and how God had answered my prayer for a husband so many years ago. He had given me so much more than I had asked for.

I delight in doing things for Graham. There is a real joy in doing something for him and seeing the appreciation on his face and in his body language. He warms my heart and makes me feel special.

Just the simple act of getting together some cheese, biscuits, kabana and drinks and placing them on a small table beside where we sat and periodically hand him a biscuit with cheese filled me with peace and joy. But then he took turns and began serving me and I was struck by how simple this servant hood role spoke volumes of love for one another.

We did not speak many words, just the actions and being together is all that was needed for us to feel the love we have for one another.

A long time ago, a troubled single mother, told Graham and me that she could feel the love when she walked into a room in which we were both present. She said we didn’t even have to be together, she could see it from the way we both looked at one another and felt it from our presence. I do believe if Paige had been in that cottage with us that weekend she would have been overwhelmed by the presence of that love also.

If you are married but feel that you’ve lost that special feeling then there are some things you can do to bring it back.

First, seek God’s blessing on your marriage and continue to pray for your spouse. Pray for them every single day, for their protection, for guidance from God, for anything you know they need.

And after that, seek for other things that will assist you. A book I read some years ago held great value for me – The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian. There is a version for men too, co-written with Stormie’s husband.

Doing courses with your spouse. Graham and I have done Deeper and Cleansing Stream together at our current church, but in the past we have been house church leaders and co-run courses together. Just studying God’s Word together and discussing it has brought closeness.

Recently we did Marriage Alpha and we were reminded the importance of ‘dating’ together weekly, even if we are married. We used to do that all the time when the kids were young but had grown out of it, with the busy-ness of our lives. We are now seeking to do this again regularly and having periodic weekends away are a good way to do it. But what if your kids are young and/or you can’t afford to go away? Can you get the kids to stay at friends’ places for one or two nights? You can always return the favour to those parents. Or take a single day off, on a weekend or whenever you both are not working, and go out on a long drive, taking a picnic lunch with you.

You got married to be together for the rest of your lives, you owe it to yourselves, and your children, to keep that love growing and building, and maturing. There is nothing like loving a marriage partner with whom you are comfortable and so familiar that you can be entirely yourself and no holding back.

And of course Marriage Alpha emphasized the need for serving one another and the love that shows through that. Which brings me back to the start of this message, the pure joy I experience in serving my husband and bringing him good, not harm, for the days of my life. I hope and pray that you too, can experience this same joy.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 10th, 2008 at 8:10 pm and is filed under Author Comments. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.